When a woman says to another woman, “Let’s go shopping for clothes”, the other woman’s typical reply is something like, “Great idea! What fun! Let’s make a day of it.”
But when a woman says to a man, “Let’s go shopping for clothes”, his immediate response is terror.
Oh, sure, there are some women who don’t enjoy clothes shopping, and some men who do. I’m just focusing on the vast majority here. I’ve always wondered: Why do women and men think so differently about clothes shopping?
My fear began as a young child. I blame my sister, Carole. She’s five years older, and whenever our mom told Carole to “take care of Jimmy”, her favorite solution was to take me shopping for dresses. I spent hours on end stuck in women’s dress stores while she tried on things she could not afford anyway.
However, not every man has an older sister to blame. Yet many still hate shopping for clothes as much as I do.
“Most women see shopping (with other women) as social,” explained one woman who loves to shop with her girl friends – especially at Orlando’s outlet stores. “We stroll from store to store, try on things we don’t plan to buy, talk, look at what other women are wearing, have lunch, talk some more, then continue shopping.”
When clothes shopping with a man, “the pleasure is gone,” she continued to explain. “It’s a job. He hates it. He let’s you know he hates it and can’t wait to leave. Men see shopping for shoes or a suit as a task. If a man needs something, he goes in, gets it, and gets out as quick as he can.”
One woman I know was married to a senior partner of a prestigious law firm. For years, he wore a blue suit and black shoes to work every day. However, he hated to shop, even for shoes, so he asked his wife to do it. She would go to a shoe store and buy two pairs – one a half size different from the other. He’d try them on at home, keep the size that fit best, and she’d return the other pair to the store the next day.
Forbes magazine last March ran an article by Bridget Brennan titled “The Real Reason Women Shop More than Men”. Ms. Brennan provides advice to companies on marketing strategies selling to women, and has published a book on the subject.
She explains that, in most societies worldwide, women are the primary care givers for children, the elderly and just about everyone else in their lives. So, women not only buy things for themselves, they also assume the responsibility for buying for husbands, their children and grandchildren, relatives’ children, work colleagues, elderly parents, and friends, young and old alike, just to name a few. “If you’re in a consumer business, it means that women are multiple markets in one. They are the gateway to everybody else,” she wrote.
So listen up, men. It’s OK if you don’t enjoy clothes shopping with women or even alone. It’s the woman’s responsibility to shop – not yours. Unless, of course we’re talking about shopping in hardware stores, sporting goods stores, looking at new or used automobiles, or trying the latest electronic gadgets at Best Buy. In those cool places. shopping is the man’s responsibility.
Jim Strothman is a resident of the Village of Caroline.
