Trump should be the new 007

John Shewchuk

Trump should be the new 007. A man’s man. Debonair, posh, and cool under fire. A highly intelligent hero that’s always one step ahead of you know who — fake news.

Ian Fleming said, “I wanted him to be a blunt instrument.” That’s one of Trump’s super-hero talents, because he tells it like it is. Fleming also wanted him to be expert with guns. Even though Trump is a staunch supporter of the 2nd Amendment, Trump’s expertise is in his tweets. Trump can tweet so fast his cell phone smokes. Fleming also liked the game of golf, and so he gave 007 a similar talent — and Trump has that one down to a tee. There is, however, one short-coming.  The “Shaken, not stirred” phrase will never be uttered by secret agent Trump, unless of course, it’s for an Arnold Palmer.

The future of Bond films hangs in the balance. Rumor has it that the next 007 may not be our macho, golden-haired hero.  Instead, recent trends toward politically correct casting could have a live or let die climax. Remember the latest Ghostbusters film. Shocking.  Positively shocking.  See you at the movies.  Cheerio.

Villager John Shewchuk is a frequent contributor to