Most of us have gone some place, seen someone and exclaimed to yourself, “I know that person!” My problem is that I have a good memory for faces, I just can’t remember the names that go with them. This is particularly true if I am someplace and see someone who I didn’t expect to be there. In a case like that I can forget both the name and face. Right now, it is not quite so bad since there is a good chance their face may be hidden behind a COVID mask. That gives me an excuse as well as time to try and determine who the person is. Probably my worst case was a few years ago as I was getting ready to manage and play in a softball game.
As I was mulling strategies, a guy pops up beside me and says, “Hi, Barry” and puts out his hand. I had absolutely no idea who he was, so I shook his hand and said something lame like, “hey.” We talked some as I stretched my mind to figure out who he was. Finally, like a flash it came to me. He was a former assistant that I worked with for four and half years in another state about fifteen years before. No question, but that I should have known him immediately, but he was not supposed to be in The Villages and at a softball game.
The above is one excuse, but it has its limitations. Most cases are not like the above. It is more apt to be someone you see at church, but don’t really know, but think that you should. There is also the fact that people can look alike. It is particularly true as you get older. For example, I could see an old girl friend (assuming that The Blonde in the house lets me) from my high school days and think she looks like my grandmother did. I would know that my grandmother is no longer around (more the pity), but I would not know that she was the old girlfriend. By the same token she would probably be thinking that I remind her of her grandpa.
One thing that is handy to have is a wife who has a good memory for faces and names. I can usually turn to The Blonde and she will give me a look and say, “That’s Dorothy from down the street” or something similar. Now, if she doesn’t remember and the person is approaching with a big grin on his/her face I know that I am in real trouble. What I usually do is punt, by putting a big grin on my face, shake the hand and claim how good it is to see him/her. Then I turn the conversation to something else. Politics usually works best, especially if you say something that is on the wrong side of the political game. If you play the game correctly, the person will most likely huff and end up walking away. You may have made an enemy, but you did avoid a crisis of not knowing the name.
On the other hand, one time I did do the return glad hand, and the guy got a astonished look on his face. He said, “Geez, do we know each other? I am sorry, but I don’t recall your name. I was just hoping you could tell me where Harold lives.” I told him that Harold lives down at the end of the block next to the woman’s whose name I can’t recall.
Well, you can’t win them all!
Columnist Barry Evans writes about Life in The Villages for Villgaes-News.com.
