Have you ever noticed that whenever you must be somewhere at a specific time, that is the day, everything takes longer than you expected? I’m a very punctual person – always earlier than I need to be and usually over-prepared. Yet, every once in a while, the Universe takes over, and I feel I am not in control at all.
The other day I was on my way to work. It was around 9:30 a.m., and I had to be there by 10 o’clock. Every Wednesday, I work the same luncheon I have worked for months. I thought I had my commute timing down, but the forces were against me that day. As I pulled into the right turn lane to get onto the highway from my side street, a police car stopped in the middle of the intersection with its lights on and siren blaring. Behind him, I quickly noticed a white hearse pass him by with a rather long procession line of cars following. SUV limousines, stretch limousines, town cars. This person who passed must have been either really important or greatly loved by people with nice cars. The parade of vehicles took quite some time, and I was trapped watching them all drive by. Not only is there no side street to detour me down the highway, but by now, several cars have stopped behind me, blocking me in my parked position.
At least 10 minutes later, another police car finally came through at the rear of the line. It was just in time for the “NO TURN ON RED” light to come on – forcing me to wait even longer. Already my 15-minute drive had taken 15 minutes, and I had only gone .8 miles.
At that moment, I was just grateful I wasn’t in that hearse or on my way to a loved one’s funeral. I simply searched for a good song on my playlist to change my mood while shooting out a text to my manager that I was going to be late. Exceeding the speed limit, I managed to make up time. Or so I thought. Just as I turned onto another highway, I ran into another obstacle. I had to stop for an oncoming train. A train I had never seen before. But then again, I had never been in this part of town at this time of day. It turns out it is a regularly used track. Lucky me. Again I am now parked on the roadway, waiting to get on my way.
Suddenly, I saw a young man come flying through traffic from the convenience store parking lot on my left before he jumped the concrete divider. As he ran between my back bumper and the car behind me, he forcefully pushed off my trunk as he darted down a side road.
Shaken, I turned to see which direction he was headed. Not that I was going to chase him down to confront him. But I was curious to know what the heck he was doing. As I turned my head back toward my windshield, I saw two very fit female sheriffs sprinting in his direction. In addition, two other officers followed in squad cars. Again, all lights flashing and whistles blowing. Finally, the train sign lights stopped blinking, the barriers lifted, and traffic slowly began to move again.
However, barely a moment later, my cell phone started to ring. My manager called to tell me that the weekly luncheon I was on my way to serve had been canceled. It seems the message was misplaced because of hurricane Ian, but I definitely didn’t need to come to work. Stunned, I did an illegal loop-de-loop and headed back home. Once again, only to get stuck at a traffic light because the Sunshine State – unlike New Jersey, actually enforces “NO TURN ON RED!”.
Regardless, it gave me enough time to sit at the intersection and witness the ladies in blue push their handcuffed runaway back to where he had come from. Apparently, something in the basket on his bike was in question. Still, he somehow felt it made more sense to leave all his belongings and run through six lanes of traffic, even knowing the police were in hot pursuit. That’s a quick way to end up in the back of that hearse.
Not me. I’m grateful to be alive and free to enjoy my unexpected day off in paradise.
Laugh on. Peace out!
Lisa DeMarco is a columnist for Villages-News.com
