We are all aware that there is a tremendous amount of political correctness in this world. However, it does not apply to everyone. For example, I have a friend who is from Kentucky. People are always coming up to him and saying things like “If you are from Kentucky and you divorce your wife, is she still your cousin?” Well how mean can you get? Besides, it is obvious that she is still his cousin. I feel for him. I know how he feels since I was born in West Virginia and people forget about political correctness in that area too. (Most people don’t know where I was born as my parents moved to Pennsylvania when I was about 6 months old).
If they don’t get my friend for that, then they bring up a state law in Kentucky that says that you can’t walk around with ice cream in your back pocket.
If people would do some research they would know it is a perfectly sensible law – a little old, but sensible. While it is hard to believe there was a time when there were horse thieves in Kentucky. However, if a horse followed someone home, then they could not be charged with being a horse thief – and you have seen enough movies to know what they do with horse thieves.
Horses just naturally like sweet things. Thus, if some poor guy sticks his ice cream cone in his back pocket and forgets it, it is not his fault if a horse follows him home. If the owner does miss his horse and follows the tracks to the ice cream guy’s home, then the latter can assume ignorance and say “I didn’t do nothing’ I got home and the horse was right behind me.” The owner might say “Oh yeah, why is your back pocket covered with chocolate ice cream” The first guy can just give a simple answer like “My cousin got mad at me because I wouldn’t marry her so she threw her cone at me”. Just another reason why your friendly legislature has to pass laws in order to avoid confrontations like above.
They really protect horses in Kentucky even as an afterthought. There is a more recent law than the one mentioned above. It proclaims that no female in a bikini shall appear on any Kentucky highway unless she is accompanied by two officers, or armed with a club! (The latter was probably added as there were not enough officers to go around.) However, the law did not apply to females under 60 pounds or over 200 pounds – AND it did not apply to female horses. You have to give those legislators their due for continuing to protect horses.
When material like that above comes up, I am always right there to stand up for my Kentucky friend. However, just last week even I was appalled at a heinous crime that was reported in the news media. It seems that a Girl Scout leader disappeared with $15,000 worth of Girl Scout cookies. The police have not been able to find her – or the cookies. My friend defends her and notes that she probably just got lost in the Kentucky hills and is trying to return the cookies. My personal opinion is that she will show up in a few weeks. However, nobody will recognize her as she will have gained 150 pounds from eating all the evidence.
I will mention one other thing – isn’t it great that people from Kentucky have a great sense of humor. They do don’t they?
Barry Evans writes about Life in The Villages for Villages-News.com
