Kids love birthdays as they know that there is a good chance that they will receive presents. As folks get older, they become less and less certain that they want to keep celebrating this date that pops up with discouraging frequency. We have a close friend whose wife had one the other day. He can’t tell you which one since if he did the fabled wrath of Zeus would be nothing compared to what would be forthcoming in his house. No sir, many years ago there was a “cone of silence” built around the anniversary of her birth date which most people refer to as a birthday. All he can say is that there are fewer anniversaries of her birth date than of his.
Now, this does not mean that he can advise anyone of how many birth date anniversaries he has completed. If he were to do so, he would fall under the “Guilt by Association rule” which is not a good thing. Basically, if everyone knew his age, they could look at his good wife and think that “she must be within a certain range of his anniversaries”. That range could be completely off, but it provides a jumping off point. Thus the “cone of silence” must prevail. Personally, I do not mind birthdays – or anniversaries of birth dates, since I figure there is a good chance that it means that I am still around.
Aside from the fact that birthdays are all over the place, I also read an article in a top-notch publication about some cave paintings that were found in Mustang which is a small country in the Himalayan mountain area. One thing that is unusual about that country is that there are way many more men than women, so most of the women have more than one husband. Thus, they do not particularly care about the number of birthdays since they have the advantage, and with more than one husband there is a pretty good chance that at least one will remember her birthday.
To return to the cave paintings, they may not only explain the disparity in the male/female ratio in Mustang, but also how celebrating birthdays came into being. The paintings are in a long cave, and there is a story built into the illustrations which big time thinkers who ponder such things on cave paintings have interpreted over a period of many years. The very first painting shows a cave woman clobbering a caveman over the head. The second painting shows the cave man looking up with a puzzled look on his face. This scene which was repeated many times caused wonder in the eyes of the scientists as they tried to define the meaning which was being expressed and what it meant to the world at large.
This went on for years until one of those pondering the paintings had an “Eureka”, moment. It seems that the day before his wife had a birthday which because of his excessive cave painting pondering, he had forgotten. The expression of the caveman’s face was exactly correct for that type of blunder.
It was then obvious that in viewing the entire cave painting panorama that the men in Mustang never did get the hint to remember birthdays. Of course, to give them some support, calendars were not too good in those days and it was hard to remember the full moon after the second Tuesday of winter solstice. This lack of understanding was confirmed in the last panel which shows the cavewoman clobbering two cavemen.
The best thing to do is probably stay out of Mustang even today, especially if you are a man. Personally, I never forget The Blonde’s birthday, so I am good.
Barry Evans writes about Life in The Villages for Villages-News.com.
