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Wednesday, May 8, 2024

Deck the Halls

Barry Evans
Barry Evans

The Blonde in the House and I were discussing potential Christmas decorations the other day. Actually, she was doing most of the discussing. I am of the opinion that you can get involved in a great deal of work which will only last a pretty short period.  However, I guess that it has been going on for a number of years, but in looking at Christmas past, I wondered does any body “deck” the halls anymore?

Come on, when was the last (or first) time you heard anyone say that they were going to “deck the halls”? I bet that your sainted grandmother didn’t even say that. I know that mine didn’t – unless she did when I was counting presents.  As far as I know folks just say that they are going to get the Christmas stuff from the attic and put it up – while hoping that everything still works.

Aside from the Christmas carol about the only time you hear someone use “deck” is in pugilistic terms. (OK, up north they may have a deck where a lanai is supposed to go, but that is just English for you – confusing.) Even then they mostly say that he had his lights punched out or something less stylish. I will admit that “deck” has a certain lilt to it that is not present in some other, often crude, words.  Since I like to wonder a lot, I have considered that there are people who actually do “deck” their halls.  They just do not want to admit it as it makes them seem out of touch with today’s present world – crass though it may be. I personally think they should be encouraged.  Bring back the old I say!  Frankly, it would not be as hard as it was in the Victorian days for example.

Most of us have seen enough movies which portray Victorian times in which the houses are huge with scads of halls. Today’s houses are much more modest in size and lots of them have very few halls and they are always very short. Thus, there is no question that many of us could deck our halls with a minimum of effort. In fact, if the lady of the house could be properly persuaded to only deck the halls, there would be considerably fewer Christmas decorations that would have to be dragged to the attic, garage. closet or whatever. This one simple step might do wonders as a first step toward world peace – or at least household peace. Look at this way, about 50 percent of the population would have time to watch more football games as all they would have to deck would be the short halls. The other 50 percent could rest their voices by not having to tell “dummy” that the stuff just put up in the dining room goes in the spare bedroom. 

About the only downside that I can see is that the storage box manufacturers might be somewhat put out since Christmas stuff would not require so many boxes. Alright, the Decoration Cartel might raise a fuss too. However, like everything in life there are winners and losers. Yep, I believe I will bring up supporting “Deck the Halls” at the next meeting of Husbands United (a secret organization). Admittedly, it may be a little late for this year, but we should be able to plan well for next year.

We all know that 2021 is guaranteed to be a better year! Let’s go for it!

Barry Evans writes about “Life in The Villages” for Villages-News.com.

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